Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Man up!

Oh no she didint.

One of my favorite contestants on the current season of Project Runway, (Terri Stevens) just gave me my new quote for living.

"I ain't got no babies and nobody suckin' on my t!tt!@s. So please man up!"

Not only does she ask the all important question about the Suede, but she also operates Funkin' Beautiful - her clothing label which I'm sure shakes things up in Columbus, OH.

Terri, to answer your question about Suede, I think he's packin' the latter. I mean he talks in third person?

If you haven't tuned into the current season. You'll notice some of the contestants are trying to outdo last year's winner in the race for the catchphrase.

One dude, who is so annoying I don't even want to name him, thus giving him a place in Google search keeps trying to make "pick a word and add -licious to it" happen.

I suggest he repeatedly watch and take note what Rachel McAdams' character Regina George in Mean Girls has to say in the post-Christmas concert scene

"Gretchen, stop trying to make fetch happen, it's not going to happen."

I figure after a couple of viewings, he'll go crawl in a corner, get the point and go fetal.

OH and next week's show promises to be the gayest ever!

How you make Project Runway MORE gay is beyond me, but I think my head might explode.

Been there, done that, got the tee shirt.

No really, I got the tee shirt.

Right here. Okay, so maybe I've only had two people read this blog - that would be me and one other person, but I got to start the branding right away.

Hence the "crafty mofo" tee shirt.

Get one.
Get it on.
Get me traffic.

Here's the link...should you have $16.99, plus shipping burning a hole in your pocket.

Make this fitted tee just slightly more terrific with a custom paint job you perform at home. Add an iron-on here, a little fabric paint there and you've got yourself a crafty mofo masterpiece.

It's made in the USA (cue God Bless America) so it's like the only product were manufacturing ourselves these days.

Sorry, still wearing my cranky pants.

For the one other person reading this, did you send an email to your friends?

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

It was a difficult labor...

But after a few screams and intense pushes I popped this bad boy out.

Okay, who am I kidding creating a blog is as easy as pie.

So what took me so long?

Ohhhh I can name a few things, as well as a couple of names, but this ain't a gossipy type of site.

Well, perhaps it will be. We'll have to see.

I guess blogs are kind of like kids, you really don't know what they will grow into.

Of course no one is selling ad space on their kids.


So, what's up with the title?

Well, a friend sent me a simple, yet poetic postcard and the front read, you guessed it.


It's on my fridge right now. Like an altar I pray to every morning.

I think my cleaning lady, Tilde thinks it's odd, but I'm not sure she understands it. Oh well, makes me feel edgy.

Personally, I've always seen myself as a cross between Martha Stewart and Christopher Lowell, I've got her commitment to crafts and his hairline.

But getting those two to procreate would require a serious batch of her blood orange margaritas.

But again, who am I kidding, I'm not a fancy East Coaster or flamboyant Hollywood queen.

I know where I come from...a flyover state that kicked Obamania into high gear and now, well I'm in your computer.

Keep on creating!